Firm

FIRM (E A D G B E)

You were right there. I was waiting. I couldn’t see you.

But then I felt you. Only slightly. Just enough to propel me.

 

And you left a trail; just subtle. Leading in and out from my chest. And I will do my best to follow.

 

And keeping firm in my heart. Like an apple in a tree. When I fall I will land in your lap.

In resolve, in thought. In time I will see. Like an apple in a tree.

 

And I hope I feel every bump, every bruise, every scratch, every moment I tumble through.

And I hope I’m strong enough. Because I think I can be.

I can be (firm).

Today I was just not sick enough

TODAY I WAS JUST NOT SICK ENOUGH (E A D G B E)

Today I was just not sick enough. The morning was just not dark enough. The smokescreen was just not thick enough.

But right now my head is filling up with all of this sticky heavy stuff. And my gut is just twisted enough.

And I drive an hour from the sea. But two times is too many times a week. Arrive and I’m just strong enough. But today is just not long enough.

 

And tonight I’ll sit down in the dark. And write a sad song on my guitar about how my life is so hard.

Poor me, I’m just not sad enough. My patience is like a garbage truck. Tip it out and fill it back up. Tip me out and fill me back up.

And I drive down the expressway doing 132 in the right lane. I’m fine but I’ll still sigh and huff because today I was just not sick enough.

LNIDIWF

LNIDIWF (E A D G B E)

Good morning. Last night I dreamt I was falling. But you came with me and now the sun shines brightly. And the road’s still wet but it doesn’t take long to forget the rain.

Good morning. Last night I dreamt I was leaving. But you came with me.

Now the sun pours through the window. And you let it do its work. Close your eyes and try to let go. Let yourself be undisturbed.

Good morning. Last night I dreamt of this moment.

Now we’re floating on the ocean. And we’re counting down from ten. There’s a darkness beneath us. Hold your breath. Hold your breath. I’ve been dreaming of this moment.

Growing old

GROWING OLD (E A D G B E)

All of my friends are growing old. I’m breathing in. I’m letting go.

This road I walk flows like the sea. It’s everywhere. It’s only me.

 

I’m growing out. I’m looking in. Everyone else gets smaller and smaller.

I’m going home. You’re growing old. You’re growing old. I’m growing old.

All my ghosts

ALL MY GHOSTS (E A D G B E)

All my ghosts; they follow me home. We wade through the cold.

The light of the moon. The sorrow we know. Following the gloom.

You know where you are. You know where you are.

 

All my songs; they ring like a bell and soar like a dove.

We follow the trail. We somehow know how to get home.

You’ll know when you do. You’ll know when you do. You’ll know when you do.

Make it less

MAKE IT LESS (D A D F G E, capo 4)

Make it less. Make it more. Make it blow up like a ball. Let it fall. Let it pop. Let the whole world stop. And go on. And go on.

 

Give it space. Hold it close. Let it know you care the most. Like a ghost in the house. Open windows. Let it out. Let it sing. Let it rest. Let it fail every test. Be the worst. Be the best. Make it beautiful. Make it less.

 

Take time. Make haste. Let your worry go to waste. Make it strong. Make it soft. Put it on and take it off. Take it home. Let it go. Don’t let anybody know. Be cursed. Be blessed. Make it less. Make it less. Make it less.

Only what I think I'll need

ONLY WHAT I THINK I’LL NEED (D A D F G E, capo 4)

Ears ringing. I still hear the angels singing. I wonder how they find me in the dark.

I’m bringing only what I think I’ll need. Sounds easy but letting go is hard to do.

And no one else can tell you. Don’t let no one tell you. Don’t let me tell you.    

What happens after

WHAT HAPPENS AFTER (D A D F G E)

Everything is messy today. I’ll just sit and let it be that way. Watch the world unfurl. Out of my reach.

Everyone is telling me how to find myself in the middle of a crowd. But I see every face.

Fill me up so I can shut my mouth. Close your doors so I never come around.

 

All she said was Ima keep speeding.

All me of was torn apart but all I said was I thought you were already leaving.

 

But everyone is loopy today. This time of year makes us act a little strange. Just try to leave some space.

The wind blew strong and she cackled with laughter. She turned her back and I never got to ask her: What happens after? What happens after? What happens after?

Sit down to stay down

SIT DOWN TO STAY DOWN (E A D G B E, capo 1)

Sit down to stay down. Make sure you’re warm enough. Pour yourself a hot drink.

Sit down to stay down. You’re not going anywhere because you’ve got nowhere to be.

Sit down to stay down. Watch your shadow crawl from one wall to the other.

Sit down to stay down. Until you’re sure enough. But have you ever been?

 

Sit down to stay down. Make sure I’m warm enough. Pour me a hot drink.

Sit down to stay down. I’m not going anywhere because I’ve got nowhere to be.

I’ve got nowhere to be.

 

Sit down to stay down. Until I’m sure enough. But have I never been?

Have I ever been? Have I ever been?

I'm dont want to grow into that

I DON’T WANT TO GROW INTO THAT (D# G# D G C D)

I don’t want to grow into that. I don’t want to make way for the horror. I’m not going to hold on just to save you. I don’t want to grow into that.

 

I don’t want to drive round and round the same block all day. I know these faces. I know this grief well.

 

Before the sun melts me to death. Before the waves turn me to sand. Before the wind swings round and we can’t go back. I’m not going to grow into that.

 

I don’t want to visit you in jail. I don’t want to scrape you off the footpath. I’m not going to let go just to fall with you.

 

Because I don’t want to grow into that. I decided a long time ago. So, you can squirm and you can suffer but I’m not going to grow into that.

 

Before the night cuts me in half. Before the footpath takes me whole. Before the birds turn round at the sight of my face.

 

Before the sun melts me to death. Before the waves turn me to sand. Before the wind swings round and I can’t turn back. I’m not going to grow into that. I’m not going to grow into that.

We drove until the car ran out of petrol

WE DROVE UNTIL THE CAR RAN OUT OF PETROL (D A D F# B E, capo 3)

We drove until the car ran out of petrol. Rolled to a gentle stop under the shade of a tall old tree. Sunlight through the leaves. We took off our shirts and walked along the grass. Following the sound of water trickling down a hill and somehow found a stream. And angels danced along the surface singing our favourite songs; the ones we’d never heard of. We jumped in, dove down deep, and held our breath for eternity. And forgot about the car. It’s probably still there.

Everything I run to becomes the thing I've run from

EVERYTHING I RUN TO BECOMES THE THING I’VE RUN FROM (E A D G B E)

Everything I run to becomes the thing I’ve run from. Every time I think I’m closer I’ve still got ways to go.

Everything is shrinking. Except my problems. And every time they become clearer my eyes well up.

But I know I am on a path that takes me there. I just don’t know where there is or how long it will take. But I don’t really care.

 

If everything is a symbol what does that make me? The ocean’s deep and the trees are green. The birds are flying home.

Some answers don’t have questions. Some slap you in the face. Some things I like, others are not worth wasting my limited and precious time and energy on when I am intuitively and magnetically drawn to a path that takes me there. Like bumpers cars at the fair. I might take a few knocks going round the block but I will go again.

 

Because I know I am on a path that takes me there. I don’t know where there or how long it will take but I don’t really care.

Because everything I run to becomes the thing I’ve run from. I think I’m getting closer. I think I’m getting closer.

Deep enough

DEEP ENOUGH (E A D G B E)

Sunrise, close enough. Safe here, on an edge. On a branch, not falling.

Moon hangs, unaware. Morning don’t mean a thing.

And I’ve been thinking way too much.

 

Let me know when I am deep enough.

And when it’s time to come back up.

 

Saying you were right almost makes it wrong.

I want to live in this word. What about you?

What about you?

What about you?

 

Sunrise. Just enough. Safe here. So we thought.

Just so

JUST SO (E A D G B E)

When it comes, when it goes. Just so, just so.

When it falls, when it floats. Just so, just so.

Just so, just so. Just so, just so.

 

Inside, cold night. What is all this?

Reclined, upright. What is all this?

What is all this? What is all this?

 

Just so, just so. Just so, just so.

Just so, just so.

 

Every day, the right one. Things as they are.

Every day, a fading sun. Things as they are.

Just so, just so. Things as they are.

Just so, just so. Things as they are.

Leaves and fishes

LEAVES AND FISHES (E G# C# F# B E)

Leaves and fishes.

Fast horses going places.

Moon among stars, ocean of lakes.

Silence of knowledge.

No, I’m not there yet.

From one end to the other.

Rolling gently through turbulent seas.

It's precious

IT’S PRECIOUS (E G# C# F# B E)

It’s precious. How will you spend it? Every colour in a ball. Just hanging, somehow suspended. From a string around my neck. And I don’t want to wring it out like a towel. All this heaviness just weighs me down. Weighs me down. Every moment, big or small. Just floating over the back fence. On a scale from one to now. And I don’t to wring it out like a towel. All this heaviness just weighs me down. I don’t miss a thing I just close my eyes. And turn my chin towards the sky. I don’t miss a thing I just close my eyes.

I might be alright today

I MIGHT BE ALRIGHT TODAY (E A D G B E)

I might be alright today. I might be alright today.

The sun on a string. It clings to my heart.

 

I might find a place to rest. I might find a place to rest.

And sit still awhile, while time runs like wind through the trees.

 

I know I’ll sleep well tonight. I know I’ll sleep well tonight.

Lucky you love me

LUCKY YOU LOVE ME (E A D G B E)

It’s lucky you love me. I don’t know if anyone else would.

Lucky you found me. I was lost and gone for good.

It’s lucky you love me. I don’t know if anyone else would.

Lucky you found me.

It’s lucky you love me.

And I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps.

I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps.

 

It’s lucky you love me. I don’t know if anyone else would.

It’s lucky you love me. I was lost and gone for good.

It’s lucky you love me.

I don’t know if anyone else would.

And I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps. I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps. And I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps. And I’ll love you as long as R.A.P. Ferreira raps.

It’s lucky you love me.

I carry these things

I CARRY THESE THINGS (E A D G B E)

Never full, never empty. Always looking out for what’s ahead of me.

Never tired, never rested. Always on my way home, always on my way home.

I carry these things in a paper cup. Heaviness falls like a small raindrop. These things in a paper cup. Heaviness falls, heaviness falls.

 

Never worse, never better. Always on my own, always together.

Never ready, never late. Always right here, always in the right place.

I carry these things in a plastic bag. Heaviness hangs from the roof — look out! It leaks.

But it’s not so bad.

Heaviness falls, heaviness falls.

But it’s not so bad.

 

Never fine, never broken. Always listening for the words unspoken.

Never argumentative, never agreeable. Always looking out for things unseeable.

We’re always looking out for the things unseeable.

 

I carry these things around my neck. Easy to forget what you meant to protect. These things around my neck. Heavy, heavy.

These things; heavy, heavy. These things around my neck.

Heavy, heavy.

My eyes

MY EYES (E A D G B E)

My eyes, my eyes are burning. Looks like the earth is sinking. Feels like my chest is splitting.

I want to dive down so deep I forget what I feel like. Find out what darkness tastes like.

Just taking what we can. You hold my heart in your hands.

 

Woke up again this morning. I thought it would get better. There’s less than I remember.

My eyes, my eyes keep thinking. Why won’t they mind their business? I’m pressed like petals in an empty book.

Just hanging on to what is left.

Just hanging on to what I am. What I am.

In the fading light

IN THE FADING LIGHT (E A D G B E, capo 1)

Sun up, slow down. Round the corner. Under the roof of a bright sky. Every sound is a whisper.

Sun up, slow down. Watch the wind turn. Over the fence they are singing: la la la la. And so on and so forth.

Pink ladies hanging round waiting for the sun to fall down.

Lady fingers digging holes. Open hands with nothing to hold.

 

Sun up, slow down. Gimme ten bucks. How can you say it means nothing? How can you sleep when you’re so cold?

Working it out as I’m resting. Learning to swim as I’m drowning. Learning to fly from the ground up.

Getting softer every day. The freezer isn’t far away.

Getting wiser and riper. Who says you hav’ta?

 

And if I wait long enough. And if I sit still enough. In the fading light. In the fading light. In the fading light.

 

Sun up, slow down. On a landship. Racing through towns and valleys and oceans and skies so blue.

I've got guilt

I’VE GOT GUILT (E A D G B E)

I’ve got guilt; I don’t know what to do with it.

I’ve got time; I’ll just let it sit awhile.

In my dreams I say sorry to everyone.

And I’ve got nights and nights ahead of me.

 

It’s filling up my head like a flu that I can’t shake. It’s a ringing in my ears that will never go away. It’s a weight around my neck I carry every day.

 

I’ve got guilt; I don’t know what to do with it.

I’ve got time; I’ll just let it sit awhile.

In my dreams I say sorry to everyone.

And I’ve got nights and nights and nights and nights and nights and nights and nights ahead of me. I’m so guilty.

I’m so guilty.