This is coping

THIS IS COPING (D A D G A E)

This is coping, he told me last night as I unstuck my hands from the bar. He spat in my eye but I didn’t flinch.

This is coping and he has a point. But I wonder how he’s coping his morning. I hope someone somewhere is bringing him bacon and eggs. I would if I had a spare ten bucks.

 

He told me a story about chairs. How he threw them at someone at the Lass. And he put his arm his partner.

She is driving to Hat Head next week to bury her placentas in the backyard of a house her great-grandfather built. They don’t own it anymore. It’s an Airbnb now. I chewed on ice until my face hurt.

 

This is coping; I am coping the best I can.

This is coping; I am building a fence.

When I close my eyes sometimes it feels like all the lights go out.

I’m just choking on my breath. I’m just choking on my neck.

I am coping the best I can.

Waiting to arrive

WAITING TO ARRIVE (D A D G A D)

I am not waiting to arrive. I am only wading through the rocks. I am not telling you to stop.

He is taking me by the hand. I can hardly see past his head. Each moment is thicker than the last.

Each night is darker than the one before. Each morning is brighter than I ever thought it could be.

Everyone has everything worked out.

No one ever needs to ask for help.

 

I am not waiting to depart. I can see clearly in the dark. I can see the world stretching apart.

I can feel myself tearing in half. Every single hair crying out. Tiny little pieces in the wind.

Each night is darker than the one before. Each morning is brighter than I ever thought it could be.

I don’t have anything worked. But I know I am closer than before.

I have to believe I am closer than before.

The OLBO album announce // Fins out now!

The Original Left Bank Orchestra (Joey Brioche, Ron Finemore, Arthur Cinnamons) are today releasing the track ‘Fins’, as well as announcing the release of their debut album ‘In Anticipation of the Day’ which is out 23 March. They are putting on an album launch party at the Seven Seas Hotel in Carrington on 26 March with support from Jesse Madigan.

 

 

 

Sitting duck 2.0

SITTING DUCK (E A D G A D)

Sitting duck on an outgoing tide. On the incoming night. Hold your breath. This fuel wants heat.

Sitting duck, shiny and green. Flapping its wings. Kicking its feet. This wave needs a beach.

I am tired and I am upset. I don’t want to say anything I’ll regret. I am sorry but I’m not mad anymore.

 

The mystery, on the edge of the world. At the end of a circle. In front of your face. Only notice when its gone.

The good days are good because they’re not bad. And the bad days are bad because of he good ones we just had.

We are tired and we are upset. Let’s try not to say anything we’ll regret.

On the outgoing moonlight we are sitting ducks.

 

When the water is brown let’s not go down.

It hurts me too much.

Being a sitting duck.

Sitting duck

SITTING DUCK (E A D G A D)

Sitting duck on an outgoing tide. On the incoming night. Hold your breath. This fuel wants heat.

Sitting duck, shiny and green. Flapping its wings. Kicking its feet. This wave needs a beach.

I am tired and I am upset. I don’t want to say anything I’ll regret. I am sorry but I’m not mad anymore.

 

The mystery, on the edge of the world. At the end of a circle. In front of your face. Only notice when its gone.

The good days are good because they’re not bad. And the bad days are bad because of the good ones we just had.

We are tired and we are upset. Let’s try not to say anything we’ll regret.

On the outgoing moonlight we are sitting ducks.

It's right there! (apparently)

IT’S RIGHT THERE! (APPARENTLY) (E A D G A D, capo 6)

Every moment incrementally beats louder than the last. You hardly notice until the thud, thud, thud stops.

It’s right there! It’s right here! some geezer from Birmingham shouts.

And then everything resets.

Like fog in the morning lifting. Where darkness melts.

Trees breathe a sigh of relief and the birds sing.

 

Where two cars meet head-on on the highway. Where a bomb is dropped on a quiet neighbourhood. Where a young woman is raped and killed in a park in the city.

 

Where the sun shines even though the forecast said rain. Where the water is warm and you know you’re loved. Where the waves crash on the sand and the grass pokes its head from the soil.

 

And Apparently is all that they said. Well, apparently, it’s all fucked beyond repair. Well, if that’s what is happening we might as well try to be happy.

I know it’s not that easy but I’ll try to make you happy.

A very small electric car idling out the front of our house

A VERY SMALL ELECTRIC CAR IDLING OUT THE FRONT OF OUR HOUSE  

(E A D G A D, capo 2)

Even if I’m not getting closer, I have to believe. If unity is the mystery, let it pass with clarity.

And when the sun comes down I’ll be ready. Or if it’s only clouds I’ll try not to cry.

I’ve been rolling around like a bottle in the back of the car. But don’t throw me out.

 

Someone is vacuuming somewhere or there is a very small electric car idling out the front of our house. I can’t wait for it to leave.

And suddenly like clouds disappearing, the morning bursts with emptiness. And I wonder how I could ever fit in the boot of that car. But it’s gone now.

 

And suddenly I am a little bit closer. And even if I’m not I believe. I believe I am.

The dog across the road

THE DOG ACROSS THE ROAD (D A D F# G D)

That dog across the road has been crying all week. He’s been crying all month.

Who would’ve thought that that dog across the road wouldn’t want to be here? He’s been wondering why.

So have I.

 

But the brightness is there. Clinging to soggy tree bark. Glistening like leaves. Dancing in potholes.

Exploding onto the footpath during the morning rush out the door.

And when he goes to work that poor old dog goes berserk.

And I know just how he must feel.

Will you come with me?

WILL YOU COME WITH ME? (E A D F G E, capo 3)

This place sucks. Why are we still here? What have we done?

I don’t know. I don’t think anyone does. But some have you believing.

 

Where can we go? I don’t know. The more I think the more ridiculous everything gets.

And if it rains for he res of the year. If the clouds fall down will they break us? Will they save us?

 

I haven’t left but I feel further than I’ve ever been.

If I ever leave will you come with me?

Old path white clouds #11

Old path white clouds #11 recorded Sunday 28 Feb 2022 by radarbackwards and Yev Kassem.